Friday 4 September 2020

Not A Lot Goin' On - Corner Gas Animated Breaking News Special

There I was, a mild mannered, not quite billionaire, philanthropist, Majong Championships regional finalist 1997, reclining on my chez lounge, next to the the roaring electric fire (only one bar on, it's not winter yet you know). I was enjoying reading my priceless 5th edition, reprint, ebook, of the complete works of Drew Carey as my youthful ward continued his studies learning the intricacies of Latin. Pig Latin, but it still counts. My man Manfred lightly dusts my Grandma whilst singing his sleeper hit single "Doo wah diddy diddy dum diddy doo". 

All is peaceful when all of a sudden Gray Dickson, youthful ward, points out of the window. 

"Ook Lay! The Uttbay Ignal Say" 

Unfortunately, I did not understand what he said as I never studied the intricacies of Pig Latin. I did, however, study Duck Latin in all it's forms. 

"Uack Qay!" I replied.

Using all the detective skills I had to hand I produced my magnifying glass and used it to look for clues. I followed Gray's point all the way to it's natural end. 

"Arrrrghhh!" I screamed as I saw all the pores at the end of his nose magnified to horrific proportions. 

"You followed my point the wrong way!" Gray proclaimed 

I looked out the window and there it was. My call to arms. The Buttsignal!

Immediately I ran to the bust of Drew Carey that hid the button to open the secret doors for the entrance to Corner Gas Fan Corner Headquarters. I smashed it with my fist. Then I smashed it with a hammer, a rock and my Grandma. I hate that button. 

The bookcase behind me slid open to reveal two fireman poles. I had those two men arrested and took the stairs to H.Q. 

The Butt-O-Matic Internet-A-Rama Scope 3000 (TM) was a blaze! Lights flashing, sirens sirening! That would explain the firemen from earlier...but didn't explain their poles. 

"They are for sliding down" Gray spouted 

"Don't be so silly, who would slide down a fireman! The friction alone would cause terrible holes in my jodhpurs!" I pooh poohed 

I checked the internet and there it was. All the excitement came to this the most anticipated announcement 

Holy Scheduling Calendars!! Corner Gas Season 3 is soon to be aired. October 12th 2020!!

The wait is finally, nearly, almost over! 

The tweets kept coming

Soon Commissioner Butt, after signalling from the 37th Floor of Sparrow Media Towers, joined the fray. KAPOW!!!


As if in reply suddenly The Riddler not the Riddler that will be copyright...The Conunderumer flew to his keyboard. THUDDD!!


The excitement was palpable. Corner Gas fans around the globe filled their tweets and message walls with hearts and claps and little hug emojis in joy. One chap called Bill put Grumpy Face, Aubergine, Panda but I think he had just sat on his iPhone again,

So, I took to the net myself. Leaping to action, like a Gazelle in a spring factory, to spread the word and whatever else I could spread without fear of litigation. 

It had been a hectic night. I fell from my keyboard, exhausted. What had I learned from the evenings events. 

Corner Gas Animated Season 3 hitting the screens October 12th 2020 obviously. I had also learnt not to write a post this late at night after three coffees and a Batman 66 marathon. 

Stay tuned folks. More news coming soon. Same Butt Time. Same Butt Blog.